beautycon I spent the afternoon among the foliage.

volume on high, maybe close your eyes
___



truth be told, I'm not as okay as I want to be or expect myself to be.
there's nothing exactly "wrong", nothing we haven't experienced before. life is always going to have its difficulties, and struggle is part of the story.


___

dear friend,
thank you for being here and reading this. I am happy to have youtube & art as a form of expression and outlet for my thoughts/feelings. i have been creatively burned out from this last term at school, and i deal with a concerning amount of anxiety/dread into my last year at school for some reason. a part of me really wants to graduate, but another part of me feels the pressure to make the best out of my last year, my education, to prove to myself and those around me that with my degree, i successfully achieve ? something, academically and also creatively.
aside from that, i've also been burned out from the routine of my youtube life. don't get me wrong- absolutely love this and you. maybe as an ?artiste? i feel an itch for something more, and when i'm very busy in school, my vlogs are a nice way to keep up my uploading consistency while juggling an intense course load. but for a while now, i have been thinking long and hard on what really matters to me here, and in the greater picture of my life. undoubtedly, relying on youtube as a way to sustain myself financially affects me and the way i approach content creating. maybe too much, maybe in a way i don't want anymore.
either way- i respond to my intuition often, and i felt that
i haven't been at my most happy riding in the comfortable routine of vlog & chit chat video. a part of me is maybe scared, of taking risks. but that is in our nature, and as we grow, we grow braver and smarter and more sure of ourselves. this video was made on a whim,
as i spent several hours yesterday afternoon on my boyfriend's apartment balcony in the summer air. I am staying with tyler for many weeks in the summer month, and prairie has temporarily moved over (she is so happy here!) until fall term of school. I changed into a bikini at one point, put on sunscreen, and got maybe 6 minutes of full sunshine before it drifted behind the trees (sigh). this was a nice thing, something i really did for myself. not really thinking about 'what youtube wants to see", what viewers find alluring, or aesthetically pleasing, but just for what it is.
ironically, youtube has already demonetized it before i've hit publish. *update. 2 days later- it is now monetized again out of the blue?*
in other news- these days i still feel stuck in being always slightly ill, a bit lethargic, and drained. i hope that continuing to sleep well each night, and nurturing myself back in my early bird routine will pick things up.
it is not the fleeting emotion of 'happiness' that i strive for. instead, i work for contentment, for improvement, and for greater appreciation of the things i love about myself and my life.
hope to see you soon,
love you
annabelle

__
instagram: http://instagram.com/pyperbleu
twitter: https://twitter.com/_moresparkles
__
filmed+edited by Annabelle G
-Final Cut Pro x
-Canon Rebel G7x
__
not a sponsored video

beautycon I spent the afternoon among the foliage.
5,613 Likes	5,613 Dislikes
54,323 views views	429K followers
Film & Animation	Upload TimePublished on 19 Jun 2019

Related keywords

gifts for mom,birds nest fern,designer shoes,gifts for girlfriend,food service,dolares a pesos,birds eye view,island in the sun,annabelle 3 the space,inspirational words,yourselves,poetry is the spontaneous overflow,atorvastatin,reviews google,soundstream,poems,poemas,inspiration synonym,singing picture,this way up,food park,poems about friendship,school of dragons,summer quotes,off white,foliage green ral,this old house,bowling pilar,girlsgogames,adorable girl names,summer captions,cute doll pic,inspiring songs,calming cream 意味,rhodesian ridgeback,poetry books,jewelry projects,rhode island college,rhode island comic con,girls like you lyrics,poetry definitions,foliage shader minecraft,girls incarcerated,girl interrupted,pull cat creature,inspiring leader 5e,sparkles copy paste,singing bee,reviews of oklahoma on broadway,poem hunter,poetry magazine,inspiring music,design space,calming verse,fashion nova,decorative art,catcreature sister,reviews of lover,inspiring movies,food truck buenos aires,peaceful warrior,peaceful warrior deutsch,হোম,thoughts become things,birds chirping,design within reach,summer school,reviews on shein,this is me lyrics,ইতালি,adorable baby sunscreen,at&t,singing contest criteria,decorative design หมายถึง,catcreature tyler,bowling zona oeste,cute girl photo,peacefully,jewelry store,peacefulness,andrea frigerio,yourself synonym,rooms hotel,gifts for new moms,cat creature tattoo,makeup remover wipes,yourself or someone like you lyrics,diyou,that meaning,fashionbank,projects in brooklyn,adorable baby girl names,rhode island red,asmr whisper,birds of prey,adorable boy names,gifts of the holy spirit,ativan,andres calamaro,fashiony,foliage height diversity,arts subject name,girl meets world,dolar banco nacion,food truck rosario,calming draught,ofertas coto,andes vuelos,annabelle 3 showville,trees with white flowers,inspirational quotes for women,thoughts in spanish,that quick,soundsmith,designer handbags,makeup artist,decorate,arts of problem solving,makeup revolution blush,artsana group,fundamentos del voleibol,catcreature gossip,beauty school,calming down,catcreature boyfriend age,summer bucket list,peaceful hooligan wiki,andorra,inspirational books,room 23 boutique hotel,fashion look,thoughts quotes,office 365,girl names,annabelle museo,makeupbb นครปฐม,andesmar cargas,asmr stand for,fashion перевод,inspirational sayings,ofertas carrefour,islands menu,designated survivor 60 days,catcreature annabelle age,inspiring lives,artsy meaning,asmr honeycomb,islands of hawaii,artcell song,asmr video,poems about love,adorable in french,inspiring meaning,reviews of yesterday,beauty shop,summer nail colors,poems for him,andahazi,school shooting,makeup artist แปลว่า,birds of passage,diy ideen,birds unlimited,rhodes college,poetry quotes,nature magazine,adorable essentials,birds nest,cat creature art,rhode island school of design,nature quotes,andes,weekly calendar printable,school rumble,singing lessons,gifts for boyfriend,thoughtseize,home loan,this is how we do it,weekly paying jobs,asmr reddit,thoughts of dog planner,beauty world,beautyrest black,this is the end,nature communications,birds of paradise plant,designated survivor season 3 cast,jewelry argentina,ofertas atomo,atlantic city,trees of life,that time i got reincarnated as a slime,itunes,foliage green цвет,sounds of silence lyrics,food truck challenge,gifts for men,this is us season 4,decorte,poetry synonym,poems for kids,inspiring phrases for students,relaxin medicine,roomba 980,island living sims 4,school 2015,poetry analysis,summer nails,artsy,design essentials,cat creature risd,yourself definition,trees wings,sparkles meaning,reviews on spirit airlines,food truck argentina,ইত্তেফাক পত্রিকা,decorator แปลว่า,that girl lyrics,school 2017,roomstore,projects near me,yourself app,calming mist,foliage of the keeper,jewelry definition,bowling unicenter,https://www.schoology.com/,ofertas coto hoy,designated survivor cast,fashion tv,sparkles background,natureba,donde cobro,trees with purple flowers,relaxo 50,schoolnet,beauty quotes,island grill,trees for privacy,thoughts sasha sloan,trees with pink flowers,relax melodies pro apk,andesmar,yourself quotes,sparkles laundry,catcreature portfolio,fundacion de la mujer,ofelia fernandez edad,inspiring vantage scg,fundacion para todos,projects watches,cat creature shop,poem ideas,home icon,home decoration,relaxo 25,girlfriend collective,calming effect,island of the blue dolphins,dolar ambito,inspirational bible verses,rooms beach çeşme,room in rome,calming vibrations,this girl is on fire,donde voto,sounds game,thoughts become words,diy tv meubel,reviews of toy story 4,arts and humanities,yourself asl,calming 読み方,peaceful easy feeling chords,peaceful hooligan jacke,diya tailors,relaxation techniques,summer league,projects housing,gifts for father's day,beauty and the beast cast,homeopathic dose,funciones trigonometricas,gifts for friends,decorate แปลว่า,dolar a peso,annabelle film,itel a46 bd price,peaceful sleep,trees in florida,relaxation,sounds true,itel s41,cute pictures,projects in person,yourself lyrics,home depot,peaceful easy feeling lyrics,that 70s show,inspiring people,adorable kittens,naturehike,inspiring leader feat,jewelry traduccion,thistle,calming 音楽用語,yourself expression,soundsport free wireless headphones,reviews angel has fallen,reviews of king kong on broadway,bow window,annabelle comes home,island park idaho,island view,relaxing chair,donald trump,funny,this is us cast,decortication คือ,funeraria la colina,arts subjects ssc,bowen,island gypsy,school days anime,birds with arms,beautylish,fashion jewelry,bowling for columbine,sounds great,beauty blender,weekly meal planner,beauty supply,weekly idol,roomba,girl baby names,ofertas makro,poems about life,poetry on rain,peaceful hooligan,asmr youtube,foliage trees,trees and trends,cute baby,summer dinner ideas,room ne demek,sounds baseball,annabelle 3 galleria,ittadi,inspirational quotes for work,room and rumours,diyoza the 100,that awkward moment,rhode island novelty,gifts of the spirit,nature revista,sparkles balloons,yourself or your self,poetry about life,thoughts synonym,nature republic,singing drawing,naturel sa,donde y cuando cobro,poems for her,sounds of blackness,reviews for aladdin,calming oil,poemas de amor,annabelle vera,decoration แปลว่า,islands of adventure,inspiring generation cap 1 sub español,asmr massage,jewelry blood orange lyrics,jewelry display,android,asmr triggers,cute boy baby pic,adorable food goddess,birds nest soup,that meaning in bengali,weekly link,yourself vs you,food en español,food market,sparkles cebu,dolar historico,beauty salon,reviews of euphoria,home tutor,summer olympics,poem types,home loan bd,cute couple pic,calming pure water,inspirational,foliage unreal engine 4,item song,room 8,gifts for women,fundacion carolina,birds and the bees,relaxing song,arts subjects,inspiring travel company,weekly schedule template,beautycounter,yourself meaning,home economics,rhodesian ridgeback puppies,catcreature birthday,trees drawing,relax quotes,foliage перевод,adorable gif,diya online,reviews of blinded by the light,school subjects,weekly ad,inspirational memes,food traduccion,relaxation time,reviews moulin rouge broadway,artscience museum,poetry about love,ofelia fernandez,adorable baby,itel,andreani seguimientos,ofertas vea,relaxing music mp3,soundset,weekly metrocard,room mate emir,beauty bar,designer belts,makeup class คือ,inspiring generation,summerfest 2019,asmr gibi,andropausia,relax meaning in bengali,island packet,rhode island,relax bus,food fantasy,thoughtspot careers,room konusu,projects for teens,catcreature boyfriend,sparkles and symbols,sparkles filter instagram,schoolboy q,singing techniques,weekly planner template,singing koko,that winter the wind blows,arts and crafts,inspiration definition,cute baby pictures,school bag,yourself sentence,schoolweb,girl dog names,soundstripe,homeopathy,andy warhol,poetry meaning in bengali,at&t union workers strike,peaceful piano,trees for sale near me,sparkles png,oftalmologo,fundetec,this american life,this day in history,sparkles quotes,cute baby girl,gifts for best friends,calming gel cream,at home,relax meaning,cute baby status,bowie srl,dolar blue,makeup no makeup,asmr darling,adorable in spanish,gifts for grandma,naturenergy,home door design,foliage 3ds max,asmr slime,trees for sale,this is it,beauty brands,fashion fitness,birdsong,thoughts of dog,calming mask,weekly planner,rooms exclusive,cute girl pic,sparkles app,adorables diapers,design bundles,singing in the rain,jewelrycraft mod,att uverse,ofertas,donweb,reviews on iphone xr,bowl,decor แปลว่า,sparkles emoji,trees of mystery,asmr sleep,singing cooks and waiters,nature boy lyrics,beauty and essex,annabelle storia vera,atlanta united,nature boy letra,summer dresses,calming music,calming down cream,weekly weather nyc,rooms beach,poem books,fundamerani,projects abroad,fashion house,oficial gordillo,makeup remover รีวิว,decora,food vocabulary,annabelle wallis,girls like you,that's what she said,soundscan,fashion collection,annabelle 3 trama,rhodes,yourself vs your self,jewelry significado,beauty supply near me,beauty and the beast songs,projects unlimited,this too shall pass,diyarbakir,atlanta braves,relax tv apk,beauty bakerie,att login,atlantis,room imdb,annabelle 3 recensione,reviewsnap,islanders,asmr glow,food week,that malicious age,inspirational poems,diyanet rotterdam,islands,school of rock,makeup forever hd foundation,gifts for her,relax premium,this is me,fashion box,inspiring girls,island h20,cute cat,singing synonym,foliage often displayed during holy week,poem generator,dolar blue hoy,sparkles brush,atlanta child murders,sparkles lyrics,decorative art คือ,jewelry game,poems syndrome,nature pokemon,poetry lines,asmr microphone,makeup base,this is fine,singing bird,artsell,diy projects,decoration คือ,annabelle 3 trailer ita,weekly calendar,nature company,summerfest,yourself or someone like you,rooms alaçatı,gifts for him,projects in new york,singing emoji,weekly meal plans,that's my boy,thoughts from a balcony,projects definition,gifts for dad,girls,bowling,inspiration point,poems describing rustic life,thoughtspot 2019,projects synonym,itel s11 pro,natureza,treeset,food en ingles,school ties,scholar,annabelle trailer,projectsam,andrea pietra,asmr network,arts bd ltd,thoughts and prayers meme,weekly forecast,diynamic,reviews rocketman,projects on resume,bowling mendoza,bowmasters,itel 4g mobile price in bangladesh,thoughts definition,bowling la plata,rhodes scholarship,inspirational movies,calming ampoule,thats my name,adorable synonym,annabelle 3 cast,decoration tape,food network,girl meets world cast,home minister,andres parra,dolar a peso argentino,dolce gusto,roomba i7,trees dallas,arts and crafts movement,singing contest,cute couple,rooms bohemian hotel,school objects,peaceful cuisine,inspirational tattoos,summer of 69,trees atlanta,rhode island map,foliage altran,adorable animals,designing women,relaxing music,projects for toddlers,oficina anticorrupcion,adorable dog names,makeup remover,this is us,calming potion,cute girl picture,nature valley,fashion killa,funeraria los olivos,decorticate,singing bowl,adorable dogs,this is 40,girl games,diyanet den haag,peaceful mind aussies,foliage don't starve,gifts for 2 year olds,artsakh,rhode island dmv,thoughts and prayers dance moms,designer backpacks,poetry recitation,catcreature guru gossip,bowling norcenter,soundsnap,peaceful warrior stream,italy,weekly workout plan,arts subjects in hsc,thisissand,ofelia,sparkles gif,relax transport,birds for sale,decoration png,fundacion siglo 21,this is america,funciones,peaceful warrior zitate,projects to do over the summer,girl scouts,makeup คือ,office 2019,summer jobs,bowling mar del plata,nature brascorp,inspirational songs,thoughts of dog twitter,girls cruise,peaceful sleep stick,catcreature sister instagram,fashionista,yourself vs yourselve,projects for kids,arts and letters daily,makeup แปลว่า,girls backpacks,sparkles steam,beauty supply stores,summer walker,arts and science,inspirational quote of the day,foodie,makeup plus,adorable cats,ofertas disco,foliage unreal,diy meaning,peaceful quotes,thoughts and prayers lyrics,atari breakout,trees lyrics,rhodesia,jewelry design,rhodes scholar,schoology,yourself in french,poetry of rumi,thoughts and prayers,diyanet namaz vakti,itel s11,inspiring generation cap 2 sub español,adorable pets,asmr eating,foliage definition,jewelry bonney,asmr lyrics,design thinking,calming lia,inspirational bible quotes,andrada,foliage ue4,home picture,poems about death,poetry websites,cute nickname for gf,fashion house outlet,ইতিহাস,singing contest poster,thatsthem,summer jam,bowie,sounds of silence,nature kpop,poems about depression,gifts for travelers,home theatre,treestuff,girl and the goat,dolar nacion,foliage 3d models,treesh,fundacion cardiovascular,yourself and john,school days,annabelle 1,gifts for teachers,annabelle 2,annabelle 3,girl scout cookies,nature cachorros,island beach state park,rhode island weather,peaceful mind,makeup revolution thailand,weekly bangalee,decorative,catcreature youtube,artstation,treesize,jewelry juego,nature boy,poetry bangla,reviews for ready or not,birds movie,dolar hoy,home youtube,islands in the stream,inspirational quotes,gifts for guys,relax synonym,home ministry,asmr sounds,jewelry brands,singing clipart,designated survivor,rhode island beaches,ofertas dia,reviews for lion king,inspirational quotes for men,andrea del boca,catcreature depop,inspiring teachers,that man oh soo,foliage for games,itel s11x,cute profile picture,diya,yourself in spanish,inspiring cinematic piano & orchestra,fashion love story,catcreature age,sounds good in spanish,jewelry kpop,summer movies 2019,atlanta weather,makeup revolution,inspiring quotes,home alone,food styling,home logo,foliage psd,arts meaning in bengali,atmos energy,islands near me,cute cat pictures,reviews of noom,cute pic,singing meaning,bowen london,itel mobile price in bangladesh,itel a46,designer brands,athleta,attack on titan,sounds good,food truck,fashion fabric,gifts for 1 year old,andrea bonelli,peaceful deutsch,projects in la,soundscape,that's my boy cast,itel p32,itel p33,thatched meaning,that smile that damned smile,singing app,weekly horoscope,birds of prey movie,sparkles 300,makeup studio,beauty and the beast,summer solstice,poetry status,room room hotel,fashion week 2019,foliage meaning,that's my boy full movie,trees with white bark,asmr meaning,cute wallpaper,bowling rosario,foliage green,fashion criminal,home design,fundingue,home alone 3,islands for sale,food truck store,atm near me,annabelle 3 trailer,jewelry designers,birdsboro pa,funko pop,island 16,andreani,decorticate คือ,dolor y gloria,inspiring synonym,fashion club,asmr food,weekly standard,makeup remover คือ,bowling flores,that 70s show cast,projects to do,catcreature pretty ugly little liars,dolor de garganta,decoration,offliberty,projects in chicago,thoughtspot,dolar en argentina,school music,atlanta falcons,diy tattoo,annabelle streaming ita,rhode island population,cute baby pic,fashion factory,at&t store,sparkles overlay,designer bags,diy surprise gift box,poetry meaning,catcreature merch,makeup base คือ,adorable puppies,funcion publica,ইত্তেফাক,girl cat names,makeup artist คือ,sparkles synonym,yourself rhymes,bowsette,itel mobile,jewelry meaning,birds of paradise,birds of a feather,funcion lineal,singing quotes,poetry in english,birds of florida,poetry types,schoology app,rhode island hospital,annabelle higgins,designated survivor season 2,that escalated quickly,reviews of tootsie on broadway,rhodes greece,designated survivor season 3,funcion cuadratica,designated survivor season 4,this is fine meme,adorable definition,sounds stadium,projects with pallets,weekly weather,calming down cream 使い方,sparkles from instagram,roomster,jewelry new york,relaxo,andrew luck,peaceful easy feeling,thoughts for the day,diy scrub,diy airco,naturel,decoder,office banking,poem definition,andy murray,food fest,designer shoe warehouse,funeraria san pedro,dove cameron,decorate อ่านว่า,island water park,jewelry box,diyanet,cute profile pic,inspiring benefits,girl names that start with a,sounds schedule,jewelry tools,summer camp,poemas de la vida,singing in the rain lyrics,bowser,weekly calendar template,summer worden,food truck quilmes,fundacion colegio uis,calming pad,birdseye,inspirational quotes for kids,diy scrunchie,soundstage,